At one point or another, we’ve been able to relate to this song. We’ve loved something or someone so much even though it has never loved us the way we deserved. But, what sort of love do we deserve? Is there even such a thing?
When the movie Perks of Being a Wallflower came out, it made popular the quote, “We accept the love we think we deserve.” Given this, perhaps we can surmise that the love we deserve is closely linked to our ideas of self-worth. This, I think, makes sense. If we respect ourselves and think that we deserve to be loved a certain way, then that it the love that we will seek. If we do not think that we deserve to be loved, we usually get into unhealthy relationships wherein we unconsciously punish ourselves for being unworthy.
There are also times when although we value ourselves and have a healthy sense of self-worth, we still fall for something or someone who do does not reciprocate our feelings. Say, for example, being stuck in a job that you absolutely love, but your efforts are just not appreciated. Or, loving someone so much yet constantly feeling that you are making all of the effort. Yes, I know, in an ideal world, the love you give shouldn’t be measured. It should be unconditional. Yet, let’s face it though. Rarely are we truly altruistic in a relationship. Most of the time, we also want to be loved and feel loved. That is OK. That’s being human.
What do we do then when we get ourselves into such situations? Well, the healthy thing would be to get out it, get away, and find something or someone else that or who will love you as much. Doing this, however, is not easy. We, as human beings, are intrinsically hopeful. We cannot help but hope that things will change for the better even though this is not always the case. So, we cling to what we love even though it pains us to do so and everyday, it chips away at the hope that makes us who we are.
The love we think we deserve is not always the one that’s best for us. Love has always been complicated and to be honest, I am as confused as most of you are as to how to deal with it. 🙂
- Pink Beaded Bustier from Topshop
- Pink Tutu Skirt from Forever 21
- Belt from SM Accessories
- Ear Cuff with Rose Detail from Swoon Accessories, Zalora.com.ph
- Ring borrowed from Rhea
- Shoes from Jellybean